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So Disappointing

No matter how good life is going you’ll be hit with disappointment sooner or later. How do you handle that?

Some Back Story

Hard to imagine now but at one point I didn't handle disappointment well at all.


If something didn't go right I would mop about and not want to do anything and stew about what happened. It wasn't healthy or productive. I honestly didn't know another way of dealing with the feeling of disappointment at the time.


Getting over disappointment wasn't always easy and in some instances, it still isn't always very easy to do. I had to figure out ways of working through it and figuring how to overcome it. Each scenario is a little different so you can imagine it took some time to truly figure out.


So How Do I Deal?

Well, that's a bit of tricky question. All I can do here is tell you how I've always dealt with since I have found a few more productive ways.


The one way I have found is to preemptively prepare for disappointment. I know it sounds like you are being negative and down when doing this but it really does help. Like any good cure to anything, preventative measures are your best source for a cure. The only way this does work though is if you know what you are trying to be preemptive about.


So as an example you are up for a promotion against a few other well-rounded candidates. You know your stuff and you feel like you have a really good shot; however, you aren't sure who are up against. Once you find out and realize how stiff the competition really is, what do you do? Well, first you make sure you are prepared the best you can be, and prepare yourself for a potential disappointment if you aren't the selected candidate for the position. How do you prepare for this you wonder?


To work this kind of scenario what I discovered for myself was to learn about your strengths and weaknesses a little and try to see the other people's strengths weaknesses against your own. See how your main competition stacks up against you. Second I found I had to work through how I would feel if I was not chosen; how would I feel about the other people if they were picked. I had to look at each one individually to really see how I felt about it and if I can handle it.


The second part of that exercise does require some soul searching and thinking about

the other people and how they may feel if they aren't chosen and you are. How would they react? If you think they may react negatively than you would have to be the bigger person and show why you were selected. If you aren't selected you still have to show grace in the eye of failure and show why you should've been selected instead.


Another great way I have managed my disappointment is to talk to other people and get their perspectives as well. Some times getting an outside view of the scenario helps quite a lot as they see things differently than you do being in the thick of it all. Sometimes this person you talk to can also be a good vent session as well, just don't make it long, and always end on a positive note.


I keep saying it but writing in a journal before the event helps and afterwards as well. Work through the feelings and understand what is going on and feed it productively so it doesn't consume you in a negative way.


One last way to handle disappointment and I learned this from a mentor of mine when she was first starting out in her business. It's ok to cry and have a pity party, but you have to cap it and you aren't allowed to go over that time. Once you hit that wall it is time to get back on the bike and ride.


I hope you enjoyed reading my article as much as I enjoyed writing it for you. If you did and found something useful pass it along to others so they to can get some use out of the words.


Thank you for reading.


Ride Hard and Live Long.


Sincerely,

Rob Hicks


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