Do you take one for your team, or do you give one for your team? Do you know which is which?
Some Back Story
I know the term is “take one for the team,” and we say it, and we all have a feeling that goes along with it!
My entire adult life, and if we’re being honest a lot of my teenage years, it has always been put forth that we are supposed to take one for the team. In the majority of my employee life it was always said to take one for the team. Work longer, work harder, forgo lunch, take on more, and go the extra mile. This was/is pushed, and accepted at a crazy amount of reckless abandonment.
Most people are willing to give extra without any thought to themselves, and want to show they really are a team player, and a dedicated hard worker. So a lot of us don’t even question giving more to the team then we probably should, or are capable of.
Taking one for the team seems heroic, and self-sacrificing, and to a point it is. But where is the point that is it stops being heroic, and self-sacrificing?
Stop Taking One for the Team
Right now I am going to go a little counter intuitive on the team idea, and say stop taking one for the team! Stop now!!! Why? Because you are doing it all for the wrong reasons, or at least to me you are.
Let's look at that first word in the sentence "taking." To me, and I maybe alone in this, it suggests that you are doing something for a selfish purpose, and expect to have something given in return for your efforts. What happens if nothing is given in return? What if there is reciprocity? Then what? You take some more with the same expectations. Taking, and taking it is never enough so you continue taking more and more expecting the outcome to change.
The only time you should be taking anything is when it is related to your health. You should be taking the doctors advice, you should be taking your vitamins, and saying your prayers... oops went a little Hulkamaniac there for a second, but you get the idea. In the world there are takers, and there are givers. Takers take, and expect something in return in some sort of way. Takers take without giving anything in return, and in the context of for the team, they take one for the team in the expectation to be obtaining something somewhere along the way.
When you take one for the team you are putting others in your debt, and expect something in return for your "generosity." It makes it more of a selfish kind of gesture than thinking of it as giving one for the team. Giving has a more positive cogitation to it. The pleasure is always in the giving not the receiving, or so it is said.
Now let us take a look at the word "giving." It literally means to provide love or other emotional support; caring. So to "Give one for the team" is to "love your team," or "to give love to your team." So why wouldn't you want to give one for your team? It is hard work, and takes longer to gain from it; however it is generally more rewarding in the long term then taking.
Something to keep in mind with giving one for the team, is that you have to manage your energy a bit, or else you will burn out, and become resentful towards the team. This is the last thing we want to have happen here. To give can be consuming and energy draining; however the outcome should be for you to have a higher worth in your organization, and in the eyes of others, but more importantly within yourself.
If you start to feel overloaded, and burning out you should step back, and take a break. The break can be from a few moments, to a few weeks if need be to get recharged. As you can see there are no right ways of going about this per se. Taking means you are looking to get something in return which isn't really bad thing so long as you are honest with yourself about it. Giving means you are providing love to your team without expectation, and you could run the chance of getting nothing in return, and burning out; however the upside of giving can be tremendous it just takes more managing.
I myself am more of a giver, than a taker when it comes to the team. I try to be everything for everyone, and it has a tendency to catch up with me on frequent basis. This usually results in emotional turmoil, mental exhaustion, and anxiety. I am getting better, and have some much needed time off to relax, and recuperate coming up and it is going to be some amazing time off with some lovely friends.
So are you a giver or taker for your team? How do handle the energy draw? How do you take care of the expectations? I'd love to hear more from you in the comments below.
Ride hard, and live long.
It's been my pleasure to write this for you. If you enjoyed reading give it a like, and a share.
Sincerely,
Rob Hicks
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